DUH-MEEN-OH! *Epic music starts playing*

Fun fact: I was originally going to post this on my newsletter, but since I’m probably the only one who knows about its existence, I thought it would be better to give some context.

Oh yeah, the title is a goofy imitation of the title screen.

So what’s this game I’m talking about?

As you can see, the name can vary depending on where you’re from: “Go! Go! Minon” in Japan, “Minon Everyday Hero” in Europe (though it can vary from language. For example, in Spanish it’s called “Minon: Total Hero”) and Domino Rally in North America.

It’s a 2007 (in Japan)/8 (Europe and NA) platformer puzzle game where you run on top of a random city like they’re a bunch of domino pieces and making your own woth your minonaide by pointing at any direction with the Wii remote in order to help its hideous citizens. Its story mode has eight stages and includes a multiplayer mode where you just kind of walk around I guess.

I doubt of the veracity of this fact since I didn’t see any sort of official source that confirmed it, but it’s supposed to be a sequel of another game called “No One Can Stop Mr. Domino”, which released back in 1998 for the PS1. The reason why I believe this is because both were made by two completely different developers that weren’t related AT ALL whatsoever (Artdink for the first one, Red Entertainment for the second), not to mention their gameplays are different.

How it came to my life

Once again, it starts with an ordinary fall evening on the same couch but back in 2020. I was just surfing on CFG and decided to give the game a shot because why not, and from then on, there was no way back. That’s just how I gained interests when I was younger and I might’ve been the only one.

I can remember one time I was hanging out with some old friends while thinking about stuff related to the game. No, I didn’t draw Minon even once; don’t ask why.

Unfortunately, nothing lasts forever, not even my love for Minon. In Winter 2021 (NOT DECEMBER), after too many failed attempts to reach that god forsaken octopus phone from Step 3, I ragequit the game.

Well, I think I still had a soft spot for it after a little while. I drew Mr. and Miss Domino as if I knew why.

But was it good?

Eeeeehhh… no. It wasn’t, but definitely not sensorially bleeding. In fact, I was aware of that since I started playing it for real.

The first step starts with the typical little girl whose balloon is stuck on a tree. If you think that’s bad enough, then look at the cutscene and you’ll understand why I cringed so much to the point I had to turn off my Wii.

Is there any way I can get CDawgVA to watch this???

The stories of the next levels keep being hilariously stupid as you continue.

In the second one, you have to cheat in golf by becoming become minuscule in order to move the ball so the president’s assistant doesn’t lose his job for SNEEZING. I repeat, for SNEEZING.

In Vietnam War Flashbacks™, a dad with too many kids can’t answer a phone call to a trip to Hawaii because they are crazy. Like, couldn’t he just push them back? Oh yeah and Minon ends up destroying the town.

In Stage 4, the attendees leave a pop star’s secret concert for some reason and our hero inflicts them brain for revenge because she’ll have to be forced into marriage if it flops.

In Level 5, an old man is late to his grandson’s wedding only to find out it’s the next day, but guess what? Right when he arrives to the church, his first love who works as a cleaning lady reappears then both get married too. Boy, what a turn of events.

In the 6 the “legend” has to shut up other species in a zoo to make an elephant confess to another one.

Then in Step 7, you have to throw a ball from a tall building with the aim of launching a rocket in a balance. This is the dumbest premise and I bet the writers didn’t even research on how a rocket works (but hey, I don’t know either).

And at The End of This Circus, everyone who got helped earlier get sucked by evil aliens whose designs are clearly based on a vacuum cleaner. During the departure, the things from the previous stages reappear but you have to follow the path. Minon disguises as one of them then they successfully get busted. And so, Minon saves the day.

EXCEPT HE DEMOLISHES THE CENTER AGAIN.

In other words, the writing alongside the graphics and voice acting are the ones of all time.

Though one thing that’s not so bad is the OST. The menu music has some OK electronic music except the versus menu song, that one’s too noisy.

The tracks for the stages are alright, most of them are J-Pop yet there’s a bit of variety, those genres being Jazz, Denpa, Techno?, Metal and remixed Orchestra. Perfect if you like Japanese music, which I do (here’s the link because I’m so kind). My favorite ones are the Options Menu, Makegumi Boogie and Nightwatcher (the top out of all of them).

Something curious you can check out are Memories, a bunch of random stories that serve no purpose to the lore (BECAUSE IT’S NONEXISTENT) that you could get in each step. Even so, I wanted to read them cuz they were actually quite hard to get.

So basically, since 90% of the stuff isn’t the best, it earned its title in Japan as a kusoge, a term to describe a crappy game. Other titles I know with this label are the iconic Hong Kong 97 and School Days. Now I’m not sure if I should be grateful I didn’t go any further, but I didn’t know much (not THAT much), so who knows.

It wasn’t the best, but I liked it, and I didn’t want it in any other way.

Present Day (PRESENT TIME!!! HAHAHAHA-)

Last season I somehow revisited this work by listening to Sentimental 3PM  and somehow came up with the idea for my Gijinka, though I didn’t draw it because I was still burnt out until now. Even after all those years, I still have the need of making Domino Rally some justice, maybe because my 2020-1 self still shines through. And given that everyone is one-dimensional, doesn’t Minon feel empty or alone inside? I always wanted to give him a little someone, someone who doesn’t only like him for helping people. After all, you can’t live only serving everyone else but you, no?

It won’t be Mr. Domino.

And a fun little end note, I made an inspired playlist :)

Buh-bye!

Also, Happy Birthday, Miku. Sorry I couldn’t do anything for you…